128 Communication Is More Than Just Talking

In this week's episode, we are covering:

Communication: More Than Just Talking
One of our biggest struggles has been truly understanding each other. Robyn would talk for hours, feeling unheard, while Victor would listen intently but miss the emotional core of what I was saying. It wasn't about the words, but about the feeling behind them. Victor's perspective was different. He was trying to find the core message, the one sentence that would validate my feelings. But our communication styles were fundamentally misaligned.

The Power of Understanding Personal Growth
We discovered that our individual growth paths were crucial to our relationship. Victor, for instance, requires extensive self-care – sometimes up to 4-5 hours daily. This isn't indulgence, but a necessary process of emotional and physical reset. For Robyn, growth meant learning to trust the universe, to understand that I couldn't force change in Victor, but could only transform myself.

 

Breaking Down Our Communication Differences
Our Myers-Briggs types play a significant role in how we communicate: - Victor is more focused on feelings, memories, and past experiences - Robyn is driven by future goals, efficiency, and forward momentum. This fundamental difference used to create conflict, but now we've learned to see it as a strength.

The Turning Point: Rediscovering Connection
We started spending time together in our hot tub, reconnecting and trying to understand each other's perspectives. We realized that:

1. Individual growth is crucial
2. Communication is about understanding, not just talking
3. Relationships require constant intentional effort

Our Relationship Toolkit
We've developed strategies that have helped us:
- Practice radical open-mindedness
- Communicate honestly
- Respect individual journeys
- Create shared goals
- Maintain personal growth

A Message of Hope
To couples struggling in long-term relationships, we want to say: Don't give up. Relationships are not about perfection, but about continuous growth and commitment.

Key Takeaways:
- Prioritize your partnership
- Communicate openly
- Maintain individual growth
- Be patient with yourself and your partner
- Regularly reassess and realign your relationship

Our Relationship Course
We've created a relationship course that breaks down our journey into four key elements:

1. Understanding personal wounds
2. Effective communication
3. Shadow work
4. Contract renegotiation

The Secret Sauce: Manifestation and Trust
Perhaps our most powerful tool has been manifestation. By consistently visualizing and believing in our desired outcome, we've been able to create remarkable experiences – from world travel to deepening our connection.

Final Thoughts
Marriage is not a destination. It's a continuous journey of growth, understanding, and recommitment. Some days are harder than others, but the key is to keep showing up, keep loving, and keep believing in each other.

Resources:

Our Relationship Course https://bit.ly/betheheromarriagecourse 

Recommended Reading:
Gene Keys https://a.co/d/3xgXEPx

Enneagram Book https://a.co/d/gINIsS2
Enneagram Cheatsheets https://bit.ly/enneagramcheatsheets

 

Coaching Services Available
Free Consult with Robyn https://calendly.com/robyn-nomadswithapurpose/30minconsult
Free Consult with Victor https://calendly.com/theworkoutwarrior/30minconsult